Marriage Tip #10: How to manage the rocky roads in your marriage
Most people think that marriage is a case where two people put in 50/50. But if you ask couples who have been married for a long period of time, they will tell you that it should be more like 60/40. You give 60 and take 40 and that applies to both of you.
Couples that have been married for any amount of time will tell you, that marriage is most certainly a bed of roses, but what you find out later is that there are thorns and all.
Even your soul mate is doing to drive you bonkers at times during your marriage, leaving the toothpaste lid off, forgetting your anniversary, insisting on repacking the dishwasher after you packed it, and never moving the car seat back into position after you have driven it all are things that drive us dilly.
But a healthy and successful marriage will have an extra super-sized helping of patience, respect, unconditional love which in turn breeds acceptance and these little episodes will still continue to cause friction, but not a full scale war. And let’s face it, a marriage need friction, without it you don’t get any heat.
Being able to communicate your frustrations regularly without fear or rebuttal builds a solid, happy marriage. When faced with times of adversity, and there will be many, you need to be able to work together to get through the hard times, as working apart is simply not an option.
Marriage is like a bank account, when the going is good, you need to ‘’bank’’ those times into the marriage bank account, and there will be plenty of those to bank every day, it is especially the small deposits that make a difference.
When times become tough and the road becomes rocky, you and your spouse as a couple will need to draw out of the marital bank to help you through the hard times.
So you had better make sure that there was lots of hay made while the sun shines. Because none of us are immune to hard times, rocky paths and difficult moments when we are faced with some of life’s hardest and most difficult choices, but getting through them is a must.
How do you and your loved one work together in filling up your marital bank account? Are you taking out 60 % and only putting 40% back in? What powerful and loving difference can you make in your marriage today?
-Jason Fox, managing editor
This article wraps up our first round of the Marriage Tip Series. Let us know what other topics you’d like us to cover!